How To (Finally) Make a Decision
Decision-making can be especially complex due to factors like executive functioning challenges, analysis paralysis, sensory sensitivities, and difficulty predicting outcomes. Below are 10 strategies that support empowered and aligned decision-making.
1. Use the "3 C’s" Framework: Clear, Concrete, Consistent
Clear: Define the decision in simple, specific terms.
What exactly needs to be decided?Concrete: Break the decision into small, tangible steps.
What specific actions are involved?Consistent: Reflect on past experiences.
What has worked in similar situations before?
Example:
Decision: Whether to attend a social event.
Clear: “Do I want to go to this event?”
Concrete: “What are the details? Who will be there? How long will it last?”
Consistent: “Have I enjoyed similar events in the past? What made them better or harder?”
2. Apply the "Good Enough" Rule (Avoid Perfectionism)
We individuals often feel pressure to make the “perfect” decision, which can lead to analysis paralysis. Instead, aim for a decision that is good enough and meets your core needs.
Example: Choosing a new hobby.
Rather than doing exhaustive research, identify how you want to feel doing this hobby, and try one that seems interesting to commit to for a set time (e.g., 2 weeks). If it’s not the right fit, adjust without self-blame. You just kept a promise to yourself to try something new, and that’s not a failure.
3. Use a Scoring System
Steps:
List your options.
Identify your key factors (e.g., cost, sensory impact, time commitment).
Rate each option for each factor (e.g., 1 to 5).
Add the totals to see which option aligns best.
Example: Choosing between two job offers.
Job A
Salary 5
Sensory-friendly 3
Predictability 2
Commute 5
Total 15
Job B
Salary 4
Sensory-friendly 5
Predictability 4
Commute 3
Total 16
In this case, Job B might be a better fit overall.
4. Limit Options to Reduce Overwhelm
Too many choices can create decision fatigue. Try narrowing your options to just 2 or 3.
Example: Shopping for clothes.
Instead of browsing multiple stores, choose two reliable brands and pick between two comfortable items at a time.
5. Set a "Decision Deadline"
If overthinking is common, consider using a time limit to reduce rumination.
Mini deadline: “I’ll decide on lunch in 5 minutes.”
Major deadline: “I’ll choose an apartment by next Friday.”
This helps move from thought to action more efficiently.
6. Tune Into Intuition ("Body Yes vs. Body No")
If you’re neurodivergent, you might experience differences in interoception (sensing internal cues), making intuition hard to access. Practicing body awareness can help guide choices.
Try this:
Think of a past decision you regretted. Notice how your body felt—tight, uneasy, low energy?
Think of a good decision. Did your body feel light, calm, or open?
Use these physical signals as internal guides for future decisions.
7. Ask: "What Would Future Me Want?"
Shift from the current stress to what your future self might need.
“Will I regret this choice in a week/month/year?”
“What would make life easier for ‘Future Me’?”
Example: Debating whether to do a task now or later.
Ask: “Will Future Me be thankful that I did this now?” If yes, begin.
8. Reduce Masking Pressure in Social Decisions
We often make decisions based on social norms rather than personal needs.
Ask yourself:
“Am I doing this for me, or to avoid guilt?”
“Does this decision align with my energy level?”
Example: Whether to respond to a message.
If it feels like pressure, take a break.
If it feels like connection, respond in a way that works for you… maybe with a brief message or delayed reply.
9. Use Scripts for Recurring Decisions
Daily choices can drain energy. Scripts and templates reduce the cognitive load.
Examples:
Food: A rotating meal plan or a weekly pre-made meal delivery.
Work emails: Saved response templates.
Social declines: “Thanks for thinking of me! I’m unavailable but would love to connect another day.”
10. Reframe Decisions as Learning, Not Perfection
Instead of fearing a “wrong” choice, see decisions as information-gathering.
“If this doesn’t work, I’ll know more for next time.”
“No decision nor emotion is permanent. I can adjust.”
Example: Choosing a therapist.
If one approach doesn’t fit, it’s not a failure. It’s helpful data to guide your next step.
So,
Decisions can feel more like self-alignment by reducing overwhelm, adding structure, and tuning into what truly supports you. Decision-making is a skill that you can learn to honour your strengths, values, and needs.